Can Adult Children Schedule Estate Planning Consultations for Their Parents?

If you're an adult child concerned about your aging parent's estate planning or Medicaid planning needs, you might wonder whether you can take the first step on their behalf. The answer might surprise you—and it's more flexible than you think.

Yes, You Can Schedule That Initial Meeting

Many adult children feel hesitant about reaching out to an attorney without their parent present. However, scheduling that first consultation is absolutely appropriate—and often the best way to get started. During this initial meeting, you'll receive general information about the different strategies available for estate planning, capacity planning, and Medicaid long-term care planning in Florida.

While your parent is certainly welcome to attend this first conversation, it's not mandatory. Think of this initial consultation as an educational session where you'll become familiar with the tools and options that might help your family's situation. No formal work begins at this stage—it's simply an opportunity to see what's possible and what makes sense for your loved one's circumstances.

When Can Actual Planning Work Begin?

The transition from consultation to actual legal representation happens under specific circumstances. Before any estate planning or Medicaid planning work can commence, one of two conditions must be met.

First, if you already have a valid durable power of attorney and your parent is no longer capable of participating meaningfully in the planning process, the attorney can work with you directly. However, there's an important nuance here: even with a power of attorney in hand, if your parent still has the ability to comprehend what's happening around them, the attorney has a professional obligation to communicate directly with them. Your parent might say, "Please just handle everything with my kids," but that initial effort to connect must still be made.

Second, if no valid durable power of attorney exists—or if one needs to be created as part of the planning process—the attorney must meet directly with your parent or grandparent. This isn't optional. It's a fundamental requirement that protects everyone involved.

Why the Private Meeting Requirement Matters

If formal representation is to begin and no valid durable power of attorney exists, the attorney will insist on meeting alone with your parent or grandparent. This meeting can take place via video conference or in person at one of the attorney's offices. You're welcome to accompany your loved one to the appointment, but you'll be asked to step out of the room for a portion of the meeting.

This private conversation serves multiple important purposes. The attorney must ensure they're honoring your parent's genuine wishes—not wishes that might be influenced by pressure, threats, or coercion. This protection is built into the ethical obligations attorneys hold under Florida law and professional conduct rules.

But here's something many people don't realize: this process protects you just as much as it protects your parent. By documenting a separate, private meeting with your loved one, the attorney creates a record showing that your parent understood what was happening, participated intelligently in the planning process, and expressed their wishes freely. If a sibling or other family member later claims you exercised undue influence or committed financial elder abuse, this documentation becomes invaluable.

Protection for Everyone: The private meeting creates a documented record that your parent was not under any undue burden, clearly comprehended the situation, and communicated their preferences without outside influence. This protects your parent, protects you from false accusations, and protects the attorney's professional standing.

The Exception: When a Power of Attorney Is Sufficient

There is one scenario where the attorney might not need to meet separately with your parent. If your loved one truly lacks capacity to participate and you hold a valid, properly executed durable power of attorney that's strong enough to permit legal representation, the attorney can work with you directly. The power of attorney must specifically allow the attorney to communicate with you and permit you to make decisions on behalf of your parent.

Even in these situations, however, the attorney's first preference remains meeting with the actual client whenever possible. The goal is always to involve your parent as much as circumstances allow. Your loved one might participate initially and then say, "I'm tired and need to rest. Please talk to my children about this—I trust them." Once that clear statement is made, the attorney can proceed accordingly. But that effort to include them must come first.

Florida's Durable Power of Attorney Requirements

In Florida, a durable power of attorney must meet specific legal requirements to be valid. Under Florida Statutes Section 709.2104, the document must be signed by the principal (your parent) in the presence of two witnesses, and it must be notarized. The power of attorney must explicitly state that it survives the principal's incapacity, or it must contain the statutory language that makes it durable by default.

Not all powers of attorney are created equal. Some contain broad powers that allow the agent (you, in this case) to make wide-ranging decisions, while others are more limited. When it comes to estate planning and Medicaid planning work, the attorney will carefully review your power of attorney to ensure it grants sufficient authority for the contemplated legal work. If it doesn't, creating a new, more comprehensive power of attorney might be part of the planning process—which brings us back to the need for a private meeting with your parent.

What Happens During the Initial Consultation

When you schedule that first meeting without your parent present, you'll receive information about the various approaches to estate planning and Medicaid planning. The attorney will explain how wills, trusts, powers of attorney, healthcare directives, and other documents work together to form a comprehensive estate plan.

If Medicaid planning is part of your concern—perhaps your parent needs nursing home care or may need it in the foreseeable future—you'll receive information about how Florida's Medicaid program works, what assets are countable, and what strategies might help protect your family's resources while ensuring your parent receives necessary care. This might include discussions about asset protection trusts, spend-down strategies, and the five-year look-back period that affects Medicaid eligibility in Florida.

The key point is this: you're gathering information and determining whether the attorney's services are the right fit for your family's needs. Nothing gets set in motion until those formal representation requirements are met.

Moving Forward with Confidence

If you've been putting off that call to an estate planning attorney because you weren't sure whether it was appropriate to reach out without your parent, now you know—you absolutely can schedule that initial consultation. You'll leave with valuable information about what's possible, what protections exist, and what steps make sense for your family's unique situation.

The process is designed to balance accessibility with protection. It allows concerned family members to take that important first step while ensuring that elderly parents and grandparents remain at the center of decisions about their own lives and assets.

Additional Resources

For more information about estate planning and Medicaid planning in Florida, visit:

• ElderNeedsLaw.com: https://elderneedslaw.com
• MedicaidPlanningLawyer.com: https://medicaidplanninglawyer.com/

Want to learn more about how Medicaid planning can help cover long-term care expenses? Check out this helpful book:

• "How Medicaid Can Pay for Some or All of Your Long-Term Care Expenses": https://www.amazon.com/Medicaid-some-your-long-term-expenses/dp/1513634712

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